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Saturday 16 September 2017

My Biggest Success | Healing Mentally

I am so very successful. Not because I have a degree, not because I can travel, not because I own nice things.

I am going to tell you my biggest success.

If I asked you what comes to your mind when I say "success", you may think of school, a career, money, a home, a family. That's exactly what I thought. Up to several months ago that is.

I graduated from university with a degree in Psychology and Sociology. I have a career. I bought a new car and I have traveled to California. I can afford to live comfortably. I am blessed to have these experiences and opportunities but they did not make me feel successful. 

I mentioned it in previous blogs, but I I grew up with distressing, intrusive thoughts, compulsive behaviors as well as anxiety and panic attacks.

As a child and young adult, I was desperate to find something to help me. I didn't care what. My life was passing before my eyes and I was stuck in my own thoughts, never in the present moment.

That was my biggest challenge to date. I spent years of my life practicing yoga, meditation, positive thinking and more to put an end to these thoughts.

And my efforts did not go unnoticed. I begun the healing processes and I started to form new thinking patterns even though I didn't really see the results until later. 

My life changed when I began my spiritual journey, studied Psychology and took a leap of faith in my early 20s. I started to heal. I remember feeling excitement and motivation again. My grades improved and I actually enjoyed studying whereas before it was something I avoided as I was unable to get out of my own head space long enough to have some quality study time.

I took on hobbies too. I discovered I am decent at (and more importantly, love) to draw and paint and do other crafty projects. I have fascination for dance. I love studying people while they dance. I often learn choreography to dance routines I like and when I find the right dance class, I plan on joining. I do yoga and meditate on a near daily basis.

For a lot of people, this might not seem like a big deal. You like to spend time at home and draw. So what? But up until several years ago, my mental state prevented me from expressing myself creatively. Having a poor mental state and not having an outlet to express my creative side contributed to a viscous cycle of anxiety and panic. 

Anyways, fast forward several years later. I was having a conversation with my friend and we were on the subject of mental health, our struggles, and what being happy meant to us. It was then I realized what my biggest accomplishment was.

Mentally, I am free. 

I have finally put the demons inside to head to rest. This has allowed light to shine through and a life of freedom to transpire. And when the demons wake (which they sometimes do), I am mentally strong enough to allow them to be there. I accept and embrace them and because of that, I am much less impacted like them.

I see the world differently now. I am the happiest I have been and I know it will only get better. I did this without therapy, drugs, and treatment. (Not that I'm against this options; at the time, I didn't know they were an option for me).

It took a lot of faith, a lot of change, and a lot of work. But it was worth it. And that it my biggest success in life.

Tell me your biggest success.

Please share and subscribe to my blog for more content.

Sincerely,
Ang


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Here are links where I discuss more about my mental state and how I healed:


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